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Working Class MAG
December 31, 2008
Just on trees I fall; rest is so relative to the breaths. I am tired of this.
It’s like to venture. Wrung with thimbles and needles, I need anything:
Someone said they were crystals in big duffel bags, hanging on shoulders like
They’re going somewhere important. It doesn’t work like that.
Understood by green tea and gracious flowers, where are reasons when blood is
Distilled and riled, smothered under skin?
It’s not like wooden cottages in lightly sun-sprinkled forests,
It’s iron hammers. Black with soot, under my fingers.
With blacksmith tools hanging over us like silver chandeliers, we tread onward,
As if we cannot perish by the flame.
© Hannah B., Linwood, NJ
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This article has 10 comments.
Ladylikeinquisition145 GOLD said...
on Jun. 14 2011 at 2:37 am
This poem actually made me feel very comfortable. like i was reading something that brought this sudden metal image into my mind. It wasn't generic like so many other which i can fully appreciate. This was so powerful that i think i deserves all the recognition it has been receiving. Excellent job.
blandiloquentia said...
on Jan. 24 2010 at 9:28 am
Congratulations. You have written, in my opinion, the poem most worthy of praise on this entire website. I don't understand why it isn't #1. Your skill with imagery is something to learn from. Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing.
Jamesbarry BRONZE said...
on Apr. 17 2009 at 1:32 am
In my opinion the best on this list of top-runners; very strong
deep, beautifully written. i had to read it a few times to really grasp it! i loved it! can you please tell me what you think of my poem?? its
TeenInk.com/raw/Poetry/article/91361/Trapped
thanks!!
TeenInk.com/raw/Poetry/article/91361/Trapped
thanks!!
Wow this was great. You created great imagery with your poem.... I wish you would have left a little explanation with so that i didnt have just my interperation of it...But overal it was amazing and you are such a gifted writter... So Please, keep on writting... You have a great gift..
♥ Jackie
♥ Jackie
kissingdawn331 SILVER said...
on Mar. 3 2009 at 8:19 pm
wow truly amazing ...How could a poet be lost for words? great immagery keep on keepin' on
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