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Burning Bridges
A thousand goodbyes burned into the canvas of your soul, caused by nothing that could’ve been your fault
Friendships ended and carefully constructed defenses built back up again as final farewells are made
A false smile accompanied by concern for where you’d go next,
And the quotidian response so tired to your ears,
Of “We’re fine, and Thanks for your concern, and We’ll keep in touch”
But you never do, and friendships end the day you leave
The weak promise burned along with the bond that you’d known was only temporary;
Between two souls whose paths were only meant to touch briefly
You become used to being the one to burn the bridge,
Setting it aflame before anyone could cross and never looking back
Knowing that if they did the bond would be so much harder to break
Sometimes though, someone else takes up the job
And you stand and watch dumbly, not understanding if you are glad that for once it is someone else
Or if you’re upset that they’ve beat you to the torch
But you still feel a dull ache in your chest, and wonder to yourself what would it be if the bridge had stayed
A thousand lonely days spent learning how to say goodbye
And so you learn how to say hello without risking anything
The many scorches on your heart making you wiser than to let anyone get close to you
So you build your bridges on shaky ground, ready to say goodbye at a moment’s notice
Never making the bonds any stronger and working harder at keeping people from getting close
But as you work to weaken your bridges you watch others around you,
Building resilient, masterful ties on a foundation of trust and companionship
And you look down at your own shoddy craftsmanship and feel as if you should begin learning how to build better bridges
But not seeing how anyone could be worth the pain of saying goodbye
From the time that I was seven to when I was about thirteen I had moved a total of nine times, and because of this I didn't have a lot of friends growing up; whenever I made friends I had to move away. I learned at a very young age that friendship was important, but also something that I couldn't really have because of my family's situation, and I guess this poem is me trying to work through my experience through words.