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the sidelines
existential crisis at fifteen,
love to pretend i’m in the american dream.
they say hell is a teenage girl’s mind,
but i think that mine was your bedroom.
make some new friends, they’re older than me.
now i just wish i’d let them be.
they say you shouldn’t touch what’s not yours,
but i couldn’t help myself, now i’m waiting at the doorstep.
i was always there but i never really had a place.
a pawn left untouched, i just took up space.
too many jokes, too many smokes, too many dull conversations.
not enough time, you're in your prime, and i'm just on the sidelines.
understand now i was just a bit naive.
felt like a fool, wanted to leave.
they say that “you’re the one we like”
but i’m never the first thing on your mind
insert myself into your life
cuts into me like a knife
they say that's what you get for trying
but that sounds like something you say to stop me from crying
i was always there but i never really had a place.
a pawn left untouched, i just took up space.
too many jokes, too many smokes, too many dull conversations.
not enough time, you're in your prime, and i'm just on the sidelines.
waiting for you to see,
the one thing you left behind was me.
i’m sure you’re onto better things.
now it all just seems like one big silver lining.
i was always there but i never really had a place.
a pawn left untouched, i just took up space.
too many jokes, too many smokes, too many dull conversations.
not enough time, you're in your prime, and i'm just on the sidelines.
oh i’m just on the sidelines
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I wrote this song about a big group of seniors I was friends with my sophmore year of high school. When you're younger and covid stunted your high school experience, you'll take any shread of validation people give you. This song was about the defeat you feel when you start to drift away from these seniors you were once such good friends with.