To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf is a book that focuses on the stream-of-consciousness without a clear plot. The whole book is divided into 3 sections, entitled “The Window,” “Time Passes,” and “The Lighthouse”. Each of these sections is told through the narration of more than one narrator and is fragmented into a semi-complete story.

In the first section of the book, Mr. Ramsay’s son, James, desperately wanted to go to the lighthouse. Mrs. Ramsay comforted him that they will go if the weather permits, however, the father coldly told him that the weather won’t work out. James then develops a murderous hatred in his dad and thinks that Mr. Ramsay enjoyed torturing him. The Ramsays also hosted a party. Many people came, and although there were some conflicts between them, they had a good time.

As the book enters the second section, time passes much more quickly than the prior section and the plot drastically thickens. A war broke out and both Mrs. Ramsay, Andrew Ramsay, and Prue died. The Ramsay family abandoned their summer house and only returned ten years later.

In the final section, the narration slows down again and focuses on more details. The Ramsays decide to finally go to the lighthouse. During their voyage, Mr. Ramsay’s two sons shifted their opinion on their dad, who they once considered cruel and bad. Even James, who would like to murder his dad if he could, felt a bit of connection with Mr. Ramsay. The book ended with Lily putting a finishing touch on her drawing.

This book presented many vivid, interesting characters. One that I considered the most interesting, if not the most contradictory, is Mr. Ramsay. On one hand, he appears to be rather sharp and rude, as we can see from when he refuses James and his occasional rude comments. On the other hand, he also constantly seeks pity and sympathy, first from Mrs. Ramsay and then from Lily when Mrs. Ramsay died. Both his straight-forward temper and his yearning for sympathy are due to the fact that he knows he will die. As a scholar, he recognizes that death is inevitable, and thus probably wants to make the most out of being alive. This causes him to lack self-confidence in his work, likely leading to his need for constant comfort and affirmation.

With the personality of hard and soft blended in his character, I can connect to him and his multi-dimensional personality because real life is full of complexity and real people have both the hard and soft qualities. In real society, males often need to hold on to their identity as a masculine identity, and that means they cannot cry and cannot look for comfort. However, males might require the opposite. Mr. Ramsay’s need for sympathy might just be what many other male characters need in real life. Therefore, while this book teaches many lessons, one that I will carry forward is the validity of male emotions, specifically the need for male characters to identify with said emotions.