Snowy Bliss | Teen Ink

Snowy Bliss

August 24, 2011
By ChocoMint SILVER, Bloomington, Indiana
ChocoMint SILVER, Bloomington, Indiana
7 articles 0 photos 129 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Love is like swallowing hot chocolate before it has cooled off. It takes you by surprise at first, but keeps you warm for a long time.&quot; - Anonymous <br /> <br /> &quot;Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss and ends with a tear.&quot; - Anonymous


Running through the woods, I laugh as I stumble over rocks, trip over fallen branches, and slip on unseen ice. Finally I find the clearing, the place we always go to. Gasping for breath, I stumble to the middle of the clearing and use my gloved hand to brush off the powdery snow on a large rock and seat myself at its peak.
“Where are you?” I hear him call from somewhere to my left.
“Here!” I answerr, still giggling and trying to catch my breath.
Soon he appears out of the dense foliage. Twigs entangled in his hair and an amused smile playing about his lips. Silently he strides over and sits down next to me. Almost instantly, a shiver passes down my spine. I know it isn’t from the cold, so I hastily disguise it by rubbing my hands furiously up and down my arms. Without a word, he takes off his own woolen coat and drapes it around my shoulders. I smile at him gratefully, though the extra layer does nothing to calm my nerves.
Anxious to draw attention away from myself, I begin pointing out various things. Doesn’t that mound of snow look exactly like a sleeping dog? How perfect is the light shining through those icicles?
“Look!” I whisper in amazement, for a bright red cardinal had just perched itself atop a branch directly in front of us. “Isn’t he beautiful? I wonder what he’s doing here, though, in the dead of winter.” I turn to him for an answer and see that he hasn’t so much as glanced at the mysterious bird, but is looking straight at me. I look away and draw his coat tighter around me. Quietly he stands up, not wishing to disturb the moment, and bows.
“May I have this dance?” His voice is barely audible.
I blush furiously, thankful for the frigid temperatures that have already turned my nose into a ripe cherry, and my cheeks into two rosy apples.
“Why of course you may,” I say with mock etiquette and gracefully reach for his outstretched arm.
Immediately he sweeps me into a slow waltz. As my head comes to rest on his shoulder and his arms grasp about my waist, I close my eyes, feeling only his tender touch and hearing nothing but the soft crunch of our feet in the snow and an occasional bird’s song. We stand there, leisurely turning in the white arena when suddenly I feel an icy sensation on the nape of my neck. I gasp and break the seemingly impenetrable spell surrounding us.
“What is it?” he asks pulling out of our embrace.
I look up and snowflakes begin to pile up on my eyelashes and adorn my hair like little jewels from heaven.
“It’s snowing,” I say as I think of how absolutely flawless this moment is. I look back at him. His eyes are twinkling. Hands still around my waist, he gently twirls us both around and brings me closer to him. Forehead resting on top of mine and one hand entangled in my hair, he asks, “May I have this kiss?”
I smile and look into his deep, dark eyes. Eyes so deep you feel if you look into them for too long, you might lose yourself and never come back out again. With my heart pounding and spirits soaring, shakily I breathe, “Of course you may.”


The author's comments:
I love writing about cute romance, especially with defined seasons. This one took me a while to perfect, but it all payed off in the end. Hope you enjoy it.

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This article has 29 comments.


on Aug. 29 2011 at 3:19 pm
DaughteroftheTrumpet BRONZE, East Aurora, New York
2 articles 2 photos 214 comments

Favorite Quote:
Washington Irving once said &ldquo;There is sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They are messengers of overwhelming grief and of unspeakable love.&rdquo;

No problem.

on Aug. 29 2011 at 10:32 am
Hazel-daisy GOLD, --, Other
19 articles 0 photos 324 comments

Favorite Quote:
It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else - Erna Bombeck<br /> <br /> In three words i can sum up everything I&#039;ve learned in life: it goes on -Robert Frost<br /> <br /> Live, Love, Laugh - ______<br /> <br /> Hope, Love, breathe &lt;3 - Me

aw this is so cute i love it! i really like the choice of words you used and it has fantastic imagery, good job!:)

on Aug. 29 2011 at 10:18 am
photolover26 SILVER, Napa, California
6 articles 16 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Live to the fullest, laugh your heart out, love forever.&quot;

I loved it! It was so detailed and it really made you feel as if you were there. It's so magical and just... ahh I liked it so much :) 

on Aug. 29 2011 at 8:44 am
PaigeStreet PLATINUM, Juneau, Alaska
47 articles 0 photos 218 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Stay golden&quot;<br /> - Johnny (The Outsiders, S. E. Hinton)

Great imagery! 

on Aug. 29 2011 at 2:32 am
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Everything&#039;s a triangle.&quot; ~ My mother<br /> <br /> &quot;Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it&#039;s the easiest way to be heard.&quot;

This was so, so, so amazing. I absolutely love it. So romantic and so well written. The descriptions led to the story's mood and to the scene at the same time (if you know what I mean).. It was all so perfect. Not a word was wasted. I love it:)

on Aug. 28 2011 at 8:30 pm
ChocoMint SILVER, Bloomington, Indiana
7 articles 0 photos 129 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Love is like swallowing hot chocolate before it has cooled off. It takes you by surprise at first, but keeps you warm for a long time.&quot; - Anonymous <br /> <br /> &quot;Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss and ends with a tear.&quot; - Anonymous

Thank you so much for commenting. You all were very uplifting and encouraging! I am so glad you liked it. =+)

on Aug. 28 2011 at 8:21 pm
DaughteroftheTrumpet BRONZE, East Aurora, New York
2 articles 2 photos 214 comments

Favorite Quote:
Washington Irving once said &ldquo;There is sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They are messengers of overwhelming grief and of unspeakable love.&rdquo;

That was amazing. I loved how you played the details into the story and how they never overwhelmed it. Short and sweet, but definitely the BEST romance story I have read. The lines were honest, and realistic, and it was exceptionally well written and easy to envision what is going on. Not to mention I LOVE your style as a first person present writer as well. Not many people are and it's exciting to find someone who is. I have been told that it is more challenging to write in such a way, but I enjoy it, especially for mysteries and romances (especially mysteries because it is happening as they are writing it, not after). It has an edge of suspense that past doesn’t. I do not recommend it for amateurs, but you have executed the style perfectly. I love the picture too, it fits so well with the story. AMAZING JOB! 5/5 and anything less would be disheartening. :)

on Aug. 28 2011 at 7:40 pm
billgamesh11 BRONZE, Grafton, Massachusetts
3 articles 0 photos 278 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It&#039;s always darkest before the dawn.&quot; ~Florence and the Machine

OMG!!!!!!! This was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cute!!! I love the whole "May I have this dance" and then the "May I have this kiss"!!! That was probably one of the best lines of a story I have ever read! Great Job! Your story was short and sweet, a perfect romance article!!! Keep writing!!!:):):);)

on Aug. 28 2011 at 6:53 pm
CarrieAnn13 GOLD, Goodsoil, Other
12 articles 10 photos 1646 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.&quot; --Douglas Adams<br /> <br /> &quot;The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.&quot; --Marcus Aurelius

Wow, this is truly amazing!  Here's my critique:

Plot: Excellent!  It's kinda cliche, but all romances are.

Characters: Definitely relatable as well as very believable.

Style: Again, excellent.  Your voice is perfect for a romance.

Grammar/Spelling: I only spotted one typo in the sentence "I answerr..."

All in all: 5/5 stars.  Excellent work!